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Saturday, August 9th, 2003
5:18 am - [Gossip item in Ted's column]
Oh ho, those Lord of the Rings boys are at it again-- and this time their high-spirited hobbit hijinks have gotten them into hot water!

Seems Billy Boyd playfully poked his pal Elijah Wood with a prop knife in the presence of police officers, who didn't know what to make of the pint-sized stars' puppyish antics. Perplexed and confused, the cops cuffed the scrumptious Scot and booked him.

The charges against his friend got fellow hobbit Dominic Monaghan's dander up-- so he rumbled with the cops over Billy's innocence, only to land in the clink himself! New Line legal counsel plans to set the record straight at Billy's forthcoming arraignment, where the charges for the hot-tempered halflings are expected to be dismissed or reduced to at most "disturbing the peace". Disturbing the peace? Rowr, boys, make love, not war!

Meanwhile, mismatched celebs Demi and Ashton sent murmurs stirring last week...
Thursday, July 3rd, 2003
4:20 pm - An Over-Extended Edition?
An anonymous tape that has being doing the rounds here in Hollywood has raised some eyebrows amongst industry big-wigs. It appears that a certain hobbit's high-jinks are not confined to being played out with members of his own species. The other participant in these celluloid antics? Well, that I'm not at liberty to divulge. However, let it be known that a certain Lady was looking rather less than her usual regal self as the frisky pair indulged in a bit of the old slap-and-tickle.

But that's not all! The gossip-mill over here in HW has been revolving at a rate of knots, let me tell you. Yes, it seems that wedding-bells may be in order for the very same hobbit who has immortalised himself on film in such a memorable way. But it seems that the bride-to-be is a different filly altogether - although her filial ties to another cast member are obvious.

Time to get that confetti out, people, as we cheer the happy hobbit and his lucky hobbit-lass!
Friday, June 20th, 2003
1:00 am - Email to JRD
To: autojohn@hollyweirdos.com
From: ted_c@isp.com
Subject: Re: Your recent blind item

>No, in fact, you are not being overly specific... and why not? As I have
>told you in confidence, I would be delighted if word of my exploits were
>to reach a wider audience.

Honestly John, the only way that gossip was worth a thing was as a blind item so people could wonder about the younger, trendier, frankly more interesting members of the cast. People can't get enough of them! I get so much mail about those hobbit hotties! It's so funny, everyone in Hollywood knows Frodo's doing Merry but the questions just keep pouring in!

Sorry liebe; if this item was about you, it wouldn't be worth the pixels it's printed on, but as an anonymous tidbit, it's money in the bank.

Give Mel my love. AGAIN.

Xox,
Ted C.

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Monday, April 28th, 2003
7:33 pm - S.O. sick?
Well well well, seems that one non-traditional Hollyweird couple may have hit the rocks. One's career is doing a bit better than the other, but said star is still discouraging the less successful partner from taking a big studio role. Could there be further rough waters ahead for these two?

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Wednesday, April 23rd, 2003
6:26 pm
Elijah Wood on the road to recovery: a car accident late Saturday night couldn't keep the Lord of the Rings star off the streets for long; he was spotted at Franka Potente's L.A. apartment Tuesday evening. The 22-year-old heartthrob left red-faced-- blushing, tipsy, lipstick-covered? Our spies say, all three!

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